Chris Rock could become a resident headliner on the Vegas Strip someday — but not until his kids grow up.
Rock mused about his future in an extraordinary interview with comedian/actress Aisha Tyler on her podcast “Girl on Guy.”
“My kids are young. They’re only going to be young once. I spend a lot of time with them,” Rock said.
His daughters are 9 and 11. A Vegas residency couldn’t happen until their later teens.
“When that happens,” he said, “maybe I’ll take that deal at Caesars.”
Then he imitated a hotel announcer saying:
“Chris Rock’s here! Bette Midler, Chris Rock, Rod Stewart!”
Rock said nice things about Vegas comedians.
His goal in show business has always been to be like Flamingo headliner George Wallace or former Vegas headliner Bobby Slayton: “a comedian you can count on.”
“George Wallace is my idol. George Wallace sells out everywhere. George Wallace kills every night,” Rock said.
“Whenever a comedian friend will go, ‘I had a bad set last night,’ I go, ‘Dude, only George Wallace kills every night. Is your name George Wallace? Because if you’re name’s not George Wallace, you really shouldn’t be complaining.’ ”
Rock credited Hard Rock Hotel headliner Andrew Dice Clay for psyching him up before recording his career-exploding HBO special “Bring the Pain” in 1996. Rock ran into Dice “buying underwear” three weeks before he filmed “Pain.”
Dice said, “What are you doing?”
Rock answered, “Eh, I’m getting ready to do this special.”
“Dice goes, ‘Why do you say it like that? It’s a (expletive) special. It’s a big (expletive) deal. Do you know what this (expletive) can do for your (expletive) life?”
Dice told Rock to go home and watch “Rocky,” because it would remind Rock why he got into show business — “it will all come back to you.”
“And I watched ‘Rocky,’ and it all did come back,” Rock said.
Since then, Rock persuaded Wanda Sykes to watch “Rocky” before filming specials. And Tyler told Rock she has watched “Rocky” too, because of Rock’s Dice story.
Rock admitted he was a comedy snob but not anymore.
“I see the good in every comedian. I used to hate everybody. Now I’m just: ‘Carrot Top’s great. He is hard working. He is the greatest prop comic to ever live.’ ”
In fact, Rock owns a few Carrot Top barstools.
“He has barstools — I guess he sells at his show — and I have carrot top barstools at my house,” Rock said.
But Rock also told Tyler about his family’s horrific experiences with racism. His grandfather may have killed a guy in terribly racist South Carolina. His mother got her teeth fixed by a veterinarian there because dentists wouldn’t “do black teeth.” His father had “a bag of piss” thrown at him for being a black driver in New York. And Rock’s teachers called him the “n” word.
“Slavery was over in the ’70s. The Jackson 5 ended slavery,” Rock joked. “Whenever I get a (film) script, and it’s a period piece, I always go, ‘I don’t want to do anything that happened before the Jackson 5.’ ”
Nic Cage and Carrot Top ate Saturday on the patio of Wynn’s La Cave. They dined on fine cured meats and cheeses, sipping red and white wines. NBA star Mike Bibby drank vodka with his girlfriend Saturday at the Palms’ Haraea restaurant. And NBA stars partied Saturday at Venetian club Tao — Chris Paul with brother CJ, plus Carmelo Anthony, Russell Westbrook and others.
“So great to see you Smurfette @katyperry! Can’t wait for our Vegas date ” — @BritneySpears. Meh.
Doug Elfman’s column appears Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. He also writes for Neon on Fridays. Email him at email@example.com. He blogs at reviewjournal.com/elfman.