Britney Spears will perform a free concert for MTV on Friday at the Palms' nightclub Rain. I know what you're thinking: Britney is a mess. Well, maybe not. People say, at age 29, she's got her life together.
Now, the old days -- that's a different story. Let's tiptoe through Britney's youth-in-Vegas-clubs past, shall we? She wasn't the wildest girl on the Strip -- just the most public.
THE PREGNANT PAUSE -- Five years ago, Britney's second husband Kevin Federline was shooting a music video at Caesars' Pure. He had been there all day, filming and eating pizza.
Britney wasn't at Pure. She was a month away from giving birth to her second child.
But she was growing impatient elsewhere until, in the middle of the night, she went to the club to fetch him -- in her pajamas.
Full PJs. Was it a onesie? Not sure.
By the time she walked into Pure, drinking orange juice, K-Fed had just left five minutes earlier after filming the video for "Lose Control." Once she realized he was gone, she split.
By the way, his album, "Playing With Fire" went on to sell fewer than 20,000 copies and was the worst-reviewed release ever on the critic-aggregator site, Metacritic.
PANTLESS TRYST -- In November 2006, Britney was post-divorce from K-Fed. She went clubbing at Tryst at Wynn with Paris Hilton. Reportedly, it was so hot, she just had to take her pants off.
So there she was, TMZ reported, sitting on a couch, pantless, smoking, just living, y'all.
Then, as paparazzi hung around the main floor of the Palms, wondering if she might show up, Britney was upstairs, dancing at club Moon, hanging with Mario Lopez, either before or after she won $10,000 playing blackjack.
THE CRISS ANGEL ERA -- Britney was the opening-night celeb for LAX at Luxor in 2007. She was hours late. Britney spoke a couple of sentences to the crowd, as the one-day-he'd-overdose-to-death DJ AM spun music.
Then, as TMZ pointed out with photo proof, she stepped into Noir Bar to swap dresses with an unidentified girlfriend. Although, "Britney decided to keep her hat, possibly because her weave was connected to it," TMZ mused.
It was reported she was seeing Criss Angel, but what wasn't reported then is just this little, telling detail:
A source tells me she snuck out of an LAX back door with Angel and they strolled to his room, as someone brought them bottles of vodka and champagne.
THE ELEVATOR RIDE -- On New Year's Eve weekend 2004, Britney partied at ghostbar in the Palms with fellow Louisianian Jason Alexander (not from "Seinfeld"). They left, grabbed a Palms worker, and went and got married at Little White Wedding Chapel.
I've always heard from an insider she and Alexander didn't look very passionate in the long elevator ride down to the casino.
The marriage was annulled 55 hours later. Her Vegas attorney David Chesnoff told a judge she was "absolutely not" intoxicated the moment of the wedding. Of course she wasn't. Why would she be?
For some reason, I imagine there could be other Britney club stories here. Do you have any? I would be ever so grateful.
Doug Elfman's column appears Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays. Contact him at email@example.com. He blogs at reviewjournal.com/elfman.