Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Copyright © Las Vegas Review-Journal

JOHN L. SMITH: Cabdriver amendment swallowed up in Vegas' kickback jungle

Given its history of special-interest back-scratching and in-the-pocket political intrigue, you'd think the Legislature would appreciate the Vegas Rules.

But apparently not.

You know the Vegas Rules. They're unwritten, but they're as real as a dancer's surgically enhanced bosoms and the legend of liberal slots. In short, they're the rules that govern the underground economy in Las Vegas. And they are a fact of our surreal life.

In a recent fit of constituent coziness, late in the legislative session Assemblyman John Oceguera, D-Las Vegas, half-cleverly slid an amendment into Assembly Bill 505 that would have banned cabdrivers from accepting kickbacks for delivering customers to topless bars, nude juice bars, and restaurants. Surely Oceguera hoped his move would go unnoticed, which only proves he's not as bright as once believed.

In Bedford Falls, such an act would have been greeted with cheers from upstanding citizens and super-square members of the taxi fraternity, who would rather quit than rope horny suckers for the tourist-hustling topless clubs. But this is Pottersville, and the drivers make $10 a head to dump a carload of gawking sports at the front door of the Crazy Horse Too and the like. Oceguera's move wasn't made out of an abundance of ethics, but out of an interest in pleasing an instant outrage action committee called Citizens For Enforcement. (Although Citizens is an anonymous group, in recent years cab company owner Pete Eliades, who also runs the Olympic Garden topless club, has been the most outspoken critic of the kickbacks and has hired lawyers and private investigators to "expose" the well-known practice.)

The cabbies, who apparently read legislation closer than the governor, soon discovered the amendment and began grousing -- something they're very good at.

Gov. Kenny Guinn immediately vowed to veto the bill, which would have eliminated the Transportation Services Authority, after the cabbies staged what some reports have called a "wildcat strike."

In an amazing waste of time and money, Oceguera promoted an amendment that failed to acknowledge the Vegas Rules.

Cabdrivers receive kickbacks, but they also give kickbacks to doormen, bellhops and other casino employees. It's well-known that limousine drivers who fail to tip doormen will wait all day for a carload of tourists bound for a local topless club.

It's not a scandal, it's the way the game is played. And the dopey amendment didn't lay a glove on the doormen, limousine drivers or bus drivers who enjoy the extra income provided by the topless trickle down.

Being realists, not all cab company owners liked the amendment, either. (They know the extra money from the clubs keeps the drivers motivated to show up for work.) I'd speculate that most owners don't care whether their drivers accept kickbacks or take a vow of celibacy as long as the trip sheet is filled out and the car returns in one piece.

One owner I spoke with laughed about it, but added that he'd rather have his drivers happy with a few extra bucks in their pockets than grousing about their low paychecks.

Is anyone harmed by the kickback culture?

Topless bars that lack the kickback policy, I suspect, but even they make so much money that it's hard to cry for multimillionaires because a few bucks slipped through their fingers.

Rubes daffy enough to ask a cabdriver "where the action is" sometimes get taken advantage of, but then this is Las Vegas. Rubes don't do well in a place where casinos serve free booze to players, and gambling bosses are only too happy to give a free poker jacket and breakfast buffet in exchange for two weeks' pay.

It makes Guinn look slow afoot for not paying closer attention, but the governor can't be expected to catch every bad joke in Carson City. Oceguera looks like a water boy for promoting special-interest legislation that was poorly penned and sure to generate deafening outrage from the community's vocal cabby subculture.

You'd think a legislative veteran would know better. You can bet he knows now.

Meanwhile, the Vegas Rules survive intact.

John L. Smith's column appears Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. E-mail him at Smith@reviewjournal.com or call 383-0295.