This steering wheel cover, made by Las Vegas-based Cool Wheel Covers LLC, slides over a steering wheel while a car is parked. The firm claims the covers, retailing for $12 each at www.coolcovers.com, should reduce a wheel's surface temperature by 20 to 30 degrees. Photo by Jeff Scheid.

Gasoline prices are flirting with the $3 mark. Road work is turning our streets into a giant slalom course. Traffic jams are making every drive a trip to nowhere. So what's coming from America's automotive-industrial complex to better our nightmarish commutes?

How about a french fry holder?

Yep, a french fry holder. Of course. That was one of the countless gizmos, add-ons and knickknacks on display last week at the Specialty Equipment Market Association's annual show at the Las Vegas Convention Center, where the automotive industry showed off all sorts of extra junk for your trunk. Don't laugh: Selling such stuff is a $31 billion industry.

Many exhibitors showed off goods that'll make your car look cooler, such as the neon lights and hubcap-spinners on display at booths staffed by jiggly, barely clad models.

But there were some practical enhancements to see, too, no matter how much the word "practical" must be abused. Such as the french fry holder.

Under the brand name of "Fries & Things," the holder is a plastic shell in the shape of a standard fast-food french fry container, with a round nub at its bottom allowing it to fit in a car cupholder and solving the age-old problem of how to handle fibery sticks dripping with hot grease while in control of several tons of steel moving at high speeds. The suggested retail price is $2.49, courtesy of the good folks at K-Enterprises Inc. of Danville, Ind.

If getting lost is your thing, among the hot consumer items of the 2005 show were Global Positioning System-guided in-car mapping computers. Yep, the same technology that'll drop a "smart bomb" right on the noggin of Saddam Hussein's in-laws can get you to your own in-laws' house, whether you wanna get there or not.

Units come with 5-inch screens that can attach to a dashboard, offering visual and voice directions to specific addresses along with gas stations, ATM machines, hotels and restaurants.

Newer models can be hand-carried and even store digital tunes or simulcast car radio broadcasts. Unfortunately, the devices don't warn you of road work or traffic jams. Not yet.

"We can do it," said Bob Callaway, vice president of marketing for Lowrance Electronics Inc., a Tulsa, Okla.-based firm which makes such directional guides. "It just takes some arrangements with one of the satellite radio groups." His company's navigators retail for $499 to $799.

If you know where you're going but don't know what's going on with the brats in your back seat, a passenger surveillance system is your thing. That's right, spying on passengers isn't just for HBO's "Taxicab Confessions" anymore.

Scytek Electronics was touting a camera that'll transmit images to a tiny screen mounted right over the rearview mirror, meaning you'll never again have to crane your neck -- and take your eyes off the road -- before telling your kids that you'll turn this car right around and go back home, and there'll be no Disneyworld for anyone, if they don't quit it.

"You can see them and don't have to move your head," said Hutch Tchalikian, a salesman for the North Hollywood, Calif., business. "More safety."

The unit, which retails for around $600, has another camera that can be mounted atop the rear license plate, displaying a rearview screen view anytime the car is put into reverse gear.

One showgoer from Pennsylvania wasn't sure if there was a need for steering wheel covers, though if you're from these sun-scorched parts, you know such devices certainly have a compelling raison d'?tre.

One cover, made by Las Vegas-based Cool Wheel Covers LLC, looks like a big polyester shower cap that slides over a steering wheel while a car is parked.

The device was the brainchild of Joe Rolston, a Las Vegas attorney who'd notice the drivers of prim Porches and Ferraris using ratty old rags and towels as steering wheel heat shields at their country club. For shame!

"Those guys don't want to put something cheesy on their steering wheels," said Kim Rolston, Joe's wife and company manager.

The firm claims the covers, retailing for $12 each at www.coolwheelcovers.com, should reduce a wheel's surface temperature by 20 to 30 degrees.

"It's the difference between being able to drive and not drive in the summer," Kim said.

Then there's the difference between being able to drive and being blasted out of your gourd. South Korea's Seju Engineering Co. Ltd. has you covered with its keychain Breathalyzers.

The smallest ones, which can cost up to $50 a unit, look like a remote-entry car lock keychain thingamajig. Blow into an opening, and it'll estimate your range of drunkenness using a color-coded light display. For entertainment purposes only, of course.

"This is not a legal product for law enforcement. This is just to test by yourself," said Tee K. Chong, a company vice president for corporate planning.

Trust me on this one: Saying you didn't blow the red light thing on your keychain will almost certainly not be a good court defense. So instead of getting blasted, just take your french fries and drive home.

That is, if you can find your way without the GPS doohickey.

If you have a question, tip or tirade, call the Road Warrior at 387-2904, or e-mail him at roadwarrior@reviewjournal.com or OSofradzija@reviewjournal.com. Please include your phone number.