Terrell Owens hosts Pure's Super Bowl kickoff party Friday. Ricky Martin gets a manicure at Elemis Spa before his show. Jimmy Buffett checks out the new tequila bar at Margaritaville.

I thought playing myself on NBC's "Las Vegas" would be a piece of cake.

Okay, as a first-timer in front of the cameras, I anticipated stage fright. Maybe some flop sweat.

I didn't, however, expect a case of butterflies to transform into a squadron of pterodactyls.

More on that later.

Early on, I ran into James Caan on the set Wednesday at the studio in Culver City, Calif. He's everything you see on the screen -- a gritty character who, in real life, spent years in rodeo.

Director Jeff Woolnough asked if we had met. "Yeah," said Caan, "somewhere -- either a jailhouse or a whorehouse."

Back to my nerves. They started kicking up when I was shown my trailer on "star row," with my name on the door.

I had memorized the script, which called for me to deliver eight lines opposite stars Nikki Cox and Josh Duhamel. She plays Mary Connell, the fictional Montecito resort's special events coordinator, and Duhamel is cast as security director Danny McCoy.

In the scene, Mary and Danny confront me as I walk into the lobby of the Montecito, in pursuit of a hot tip. That's a familiar scenario, so no sweat, right?

Wrong. The only lines I didn't botch were "Hello Mary" and "Danny."

Toward the end of the two-hour shoot in front of dozens of extras, there were moments when my mind went blissfully blank.

Poor Nikki and Josh. They, along with Woolnough and others, were incredibly supportive while trying to revive me from my moments of sheer catatonic terror. Thanks to all for the endless patience and to execs Scott Steindorff, Gary Scott Thompson and Matt Pyken for the invite.

The episode, titled "Coyote Ugly," airs March 3, when the series moves from its Monday time slot to Friday.

A more appropriate title: "Don't Quit Your Day Job."

TERRELL'S VERSION

Terrell Owens' publicist wants the benefit of doubt.

Back on Jan. 3, I reported that Owens and his party stiffed a limo driver out of a $200 fare.

In an e-mail, his rep, Kim Eldredge, confirmed Owens took a limo with friends early Jan. 1 from Caesars Palace to the Palms -- "a less than five-minute ride," she said.

Upon exiting the limo at the Palms, Owens offered to pay the club promoter who hailed the ride, Eldredge said. "If the driver was stiffed, that was no fault of Terrell's," she said.

The limo driver's account differs dramatically.

Because of snarled New Year's Eve traffic, it was much longer than a five-minute ride, he said, and when Owens' party exited the limo, no one offered to pay, so the driver was forced to follow them into the Palms to collect. After 25 minutes of haggling, the limo driver said he left when no one would cough up the fare.

Owens, recently named the No.1 most hated athlete by GQ magazine, hosts Pure's Super Bowl kickoff party on Friday.

SIGHTINGS

Ricky Martin, getting a manicure Friday at Elemis Spa (Aladdin) before his concert. ... At Rain nightclub (Palms) on Friday: Indianapolis Colts kicker Mike Vanderjagt, who missed a 46-yard field goal attempt with 17 seconds left that gave the Pittsburgh Steelers a 21-18 victory in an AFC playoff game two weeks ago... Jimmy Buffett, checking out the new tequila bar in Margaritaville (Flamingo) Friday night and accommodating fans.

THE PUNCH LINE

"After Colts' loss to Steelers, declared jihad on Mike Vanderjagt." -- From David Letterman's Top Ten Surprising Facts About Osama bin Laden

Norm Clarke can be reached at 383-0244 or norm@reviewjournal.com.