Arturo Martinez reads slowly, his speech impaired - partly by the brain injury, partly from raw emotion.
Forgiving the man who raped and killed his wife and daughter and left him with an inch-deep indentation in the back of his head is the hardest thing he's ever done, he says, but he will do it for the two sons at his side.
His 9-year-old son, Cristopher , helps him with the words and offers him tissues to wipe his wet eyes and nose. He offers him a sip of water when he stumbles.
Little Alejandro, now 5 years old, does not understand the grief on his father's face, but his presence is comforting.
"This terrible crime is just one of many evil things in our world," he says. "I choose not to give in to this evil. I choose life and happiness for my sons. ... We choose to turn our heads away from evil and acknowledge the good things in this world. We choose to be strong and move forward."
There are many things remarkable about Martinez. Nearly four months after he was randomly attacked with a claw hammer in his home, he is walking and talking. He's reopening his boxing gym Saturday. He's caring for his two young sons, with the help of his sister and brother-in-law.
But what many people found most remarkable Thursday was his capacity to forgive Bryan Clay, the man police say brutally attacked his family in one of the worst crimes in recent valley history.
To Martinez, however, his faith grants him no choice: "I have to forgive him."
Martinez hosted a news conference Thursday in front of friends, family and local politicians to thank them for their help and announce his forgiveness. The venue was his boxing gym on Civic Center Boulevard at Cheyenne Avenue, which he opened last year but has been closed since his assault.
The gym looks far different today - local trade unions volunteered time and equipment to remodel the place, painting the floors and walls and repairing the plumbing and electricity.
But the gym's slogan, in fresh paint, remains the same: "We grow champions."
His daughter, Karla, 10, came up with the slogan, Martinez said. His wife, Ignacia "Yadira," 38, kissed him before he left for the gym each day and reminded him of the young people who needed his guidance.
Even though he doesn't have a home - he refuses to return to his now-boarded-up central valley house, at 1016 Robin St. - he wants to continue their dream by reopening the gym.
Martinez remembers nothing of the April 16 attack.
He awoke about 5 p.m., surrounded by blood, dizzy and weak. He looked to the bedroom and found the walls covered in blood.
"After I saw this, I checked on my daughter and saw the same exact scene all over again," he said in a statement released Thursday.
He found his two sons, unharmed, looking up at him.
"What happened?" they asked.
He had no words.
He looked for the suspect, found no one, and retrieved a cellphone. He tried to dial 911 but couldn't get his fingers to do what he wanted, unaware that his skull was fractured in 17 places.
Before he passed out, he told Cristopher to go to school and tell them what happened. The next thing he knew, officers woke him and placed him in handcuffs, according to his statement.
Cristopher said the five days he and his brother spent in protective custody at Child Haven, away from his family, were the most difficult times in the aftermath.
The boys ate, slept, played video games and mostly worried about their father.
"It wasn't like home," he said.
Now the family is staying with Martinez's sister, Gaudia Seal-Martinez, and her husband, Ken Seal. Cristopher said the family has been very helpful with their dad's recovery.
Martinez spent 13 days at University Medical Center, going through two major brain surgeries. He's spent more than a month in a rehabilitation hospital.
Police arrested Clay less than two weeks after the incident. They believe he broke into the home between 2 and 4 a.m. and used a claw hammer to bludgeon Martinez, his wife and his daughter. Police believe the attack was random. Clay has pleaded not guilty to the crime.
"Our happy family was destroyed by the evil of this man," Martinez said.
Cristopher said he wishes most for his father's recovery and his family's future happiness.
"I don't want him to feel frustrated ... not to feel rushed," Cristopher said. "I want him to be organized and happy."
But forgiveness is part of recovery.
"I have to forgive him once and that's it," Martinez said of Clay. "And if he gave me a kiss, I would give him a kiss."
He doubts that will happen.
Although their father has preached forgiveness, Cristopher said it will be difficult to accept.
"He killed a kid," he said. "He killed my sister."