Two years ago, I told you about an indulgent weekend Charlie Sheen shared with Bret Michaels and Matt Sorum of Guns N’ Roses. As Sorum told me at the time:
The trio flew in from Los Angeles, did cocaine “the size of Oprah,” saw a Mike Tyson fight, partied with strippers and, um, other women.
I finally asked Michaels about this story, and he says, “It was all true … a party of biblical proportions.”
But that’s not all, Michaels says.
Back in 1995, Michaels was the man who showed Sheen how to destroy a hotel room in Orlando.
“I heard Charlie in the room across the hall,” Michaels says, “and I heard this weak pushing-over of the vase, like a thump.
“I get a call from Charlie. He goes, ‘Bret, I’m trying to destroy this room like a rock star.’ ”
Michaels went to Sheen’s room and advised him get in touch with his annoyance toward, for example, an agent.
“I said, ‘Are you angry about anything? … You don’t want to go into a hotel room and KINDLY break it up. … We’re gonna go crazy.’ ”
Michaels set the vase back upright, told Sheen to visualize an agent’s face on the vase, and “kick it.”
“It went flying and smash! And then your adrenaline is pumping. And then me and Charlie professionally tore up” the rest of the room.
“He’s a fast learner,” Michaels says with a laugh. “My prodigy surpassed anything I could dream of in the smashing of hotel rooms. He quickly escalated his ability to raise hell.
“Then we did it in a strip club later that night. They kindly asked us to leave,” Michaels says. “I mean, who gets thrown out of a strip club? Nobody!”
Michaels recalls they got ejected from the strip club because “we maybe got a little excited” and hopped onstage with dancers.
For the sake of clarity, he says, the following primer is how a rock star gets motivated to destroy a hotel room:
“What starts to creep in is frustration. Then what creeps in is a bad phone call from an agent (or a promoter) who’s (messed) you over.
“Then, something gets a backhand slap on the counter. Then you’re mad that you broke something valuable that you own. This is where it goes to the next level.
“The TV is the only thing you gotta be careful of. You don’t want it to go out the window.
“But if you’re gonna smash it, you have to take one breath and clear the area below. Like golf, you yell, ‘Fore!’ Then out goes the TV. You don’t want to get anyone killed or injured.
“And you don’t want to get sued because you’ll get angrier and wreck another room. It’s a vicious cycle.
“There’s a certain science to wrecking (stuff) that people don’t understand.”
Michaels performs May 6 at Eastside Cannery. And on May 7, he awards $25,000 of his own money, with a trophy in his name, to the “toughest, most tenacious” rider at the Supercross Finals at Sam Boyd Stadium.
Sheen will be in Vegas on Saturday as celebrity host at Chateau nightclub.
Michaels says it’s important for us to know that people like him and Sheen don’t always smash hotel rooms. He parties for fun and shies away from going to a “dark place.”
“We’ve had some good times. That’s for damn sure.”
But every now and then, a rock star has a bad day, and a room’s just gotta get busted.
Doug Elfman’s column appears Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays. Contact him at email@example.com. He blogs at reviewjournal.com/elfman.