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Bosh’s week gets worse off court

Poor Chris Bosh.

The distant third option in Miami’s faltering triumvirate was sidelined for a few weeks and unable to contribute to the Heat’s playoff run.

With the season on the line, the forward returned to action Tuesday for Game 5, only to find himself back on the bench down the stretch watching the Celtics take a 3-2 lead in the Eastern Conference finals.

Sadly, his team’s meltdown wasn’t the worst thing Bosh endured this week. His personal masseuse died Monday shortly after collapsing at the All-Star forward’s home.

Now Bosh and the Heat must attempt to put the tragedy, and the lackluster performances of the past three games, in the past if they have any hope to end the season on a happy note.

■ LAVERNE AND SURELY DUPED – A man claiming to be Lamar Odom’s personal assistant allegedly duped famed actress and director Penny Marshall out of $5,000, according to TMZ.

The report says the unidentified man approached Marshall at a Los Angeles Lakers game last month and represented himself as Odom’s assistant. He gave Marshall a phone number, claiming it was Odom’s.

Marshall texted back and forth with someone she thought was Odom for several days, then got a request from “Odom” to lend his assistant some money.

Marshall complied and handed over the money.

After the cash changed hands, “Odom” and the assistant stopped responding to Marshall.

First of all, shame on Marshall for falling for such an elementary scam.

The craziest part of the story is that now all you have to do to get money for no reason is pretend to be someone who knows someone connected to the Kardashian family.

■ PLEASE DON’T GO – A 6-year-old kid named Joe couldn’t figure out why Brandon Jacobs had left his beloved New York Giants to play for the San Francisco 49ers this offseason.

His mother tried to explain to him that the Giants couldn’t afford to keep the mediocre running back with a star price tag.

So Joe decided to do whatever he could to get Jacobs back to the defending Super Bowl champions, so he penned a letter that basically read: “So you could go to the Giants, here is my money.”

He included the money from his piggy bank totaling $3.36.

Jacobs tweeted out the letter and told his followers he was touched by the letter and would do something for the kid, likely setting up a surprise meeting.

Unfortunately, that’s not going to be enough money to get Jacobs back to the Giants. Maybe the kid should hit up Penny Marshall for extra cash.

■ HE’S GOT THE JIMMY LEGS – Most restless kids have heard one of the older folks in the family admonish their rambunctiousness by saying they look like they have “ants in their pants.”

Apparently, that’s a real thing.

Cowboys fullback Lawrence Vickers had to leave the practice field after finding ants in his pants.

Don’t laugh. Vickers says he is allergic to the critters.

His story, however, was called into doubt when he said he didn’t get a lot of sleep because he forgot to not let the bedbugs bite.

COMPILED BY ADAM HILL
LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL

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