LEFTOVERS: Let’s toast America’s worst job

A recent study by ranked newspaper reporter as this year’s worst job in America.

We vehemently disagreed with the ranking — which factored in the position’s relative low pay, high stress, demanding schedule and uncertain future — until being confronted with a harsh reality: We can’t accept free beer.

Maybe the study, which ranked 200 jobs, was onto something after all.

We recently wrote about Heat forward Shane Battier receiving a surprise shipment of Bud Light after stating he superstitiously stuck to that brand of beer during Miami’s 27-game win streak.

After joking that we celebrated each edition of Leftovers with an Amstel Light, we pleasantly were surprised to receive an offer of 30 complimentary cases of the Amsterdam lager from a local beer distributor.

Envisioning myself being hailed as a conquering hero in the newsroom — as I would’ve been in the politically incorrect 1960s and ’70s — I instead was told by my boss that we can’t accept the generous gift.

Something about conflict of interest. I don’t think it conflicts with my interests — unless covering Dollar Beer Night at Cashman Field counts — but that’s the way it goes at the worst job in America.

Just kidding. I love my job and certainly am not hoping to receive any lucrative offers as a result of this column.

■ ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT — Former Detroit Lions wide receiver Titus Young was arrested twice in 15 hours Sunday, but he’ll need to get apprehended again soon to match the unofficial NFL record set by former New York Jets cornerback Cliff Harris, who was arrested Tuesday for the third time in nine days.

Harris was caught smoking marijuana in New Jersey on April 29, and the Jets cut him shortly thereafter. He was arrested again Saturday for domestic harassment outside a Buffalo Wild Wings in Oregon, where police said he pushed his girlfriend. Driving to court Tuesday, Harris was pulled over for speeding and passing in a no-passing zone. He later was arrested for failure to appear in court.

Harris was kicked off Oregon’s football team for run-ins with the law in 2011, when he was pulled over for driving 118 mph with a suspended license. When the officer smelled marijuana in the car and asked who had it, Harris replied, “We smoked it all.”

Young, a former Boise State star, was stopped at 12:01
a.m. Sunday and arrested for suspicion of driving under the influence. Released from custody later that day, Young jumped over the fence of a tow company yard and was looking for his Mustang when he was arrested at 2:22 p.m. for trying to steal his car.

No truth to the rumor that the Cincinnati Bengals are interested in signing Young and Harris — aka “Dumber and Dumbest.”

■ WRECK SHOP — Texas Tech football coach Kliff Kingsbury left a note for his players urging them to stay active after leaving campus.

“Sitting at the house playing COD/2K13/Madden against 12 year olds online doesn’t suffice as ‘activity’ even if you claim to ‘wreck shop,’ ” he wrote.

Now if we can only find out what “wreck shop” means.

Time for a cold one.

(Editor’s note: Dude, you’ve be pwned. “Wreck shop” is gamer slang for annihilating your opponent.)


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