After 26 years, it appears they are trying to run out Chris Ault as football coach at UNR.
The Little General. One of three active coaches in the College Football Hall of Fame. Being run out.
This would be like running Joe Paterno out of Penn State. Like running peanut butter out of a Reese’s cup.
Were it not for Joe Pa and Peanut Bu, Penn State football and a Reese’s cup would not be what they are today.
This is why Chris Ault should not be run out of UNR on someone else’s terms. The Little General should get to walk out, on his terms. He should get to take his Pistol offense with him.
And while we’re at it, a Twix chocolate bar is a poor substitute for a Kit Kat.
A Twix only has two pieces.
A Kit Kat has four.
Caramel is overrated.
• INTEREST TO SPARE: Two of the past three winners on the pro bowlers tour have been a guy who was laid off by General Motors (Tom Smallwood) and a woman (Kelly Kulick, at last week’s Tournament of Champions at Red Rock Lanes). This has resulted in a tremendous spike in media interest in pro ten pins. This is why I expect Michael Jordan, Brett Favre and Mickey Rourke will launch their next comebacks in a bowling alley.
• HARPER’S BIZARRE (RBI): Arizona Western tried to issue an intentional walk to College of Southern Nevada wunderkind Bryce Harper in his first official game with the Coyotes. The Kid reached across the plate and swatted the ball into left field for a sacrifice fly. OK, so the lights at Morse Stadium didn’t explode and sparks didn’t rain down on the field. But you have to admit that hitting a sacrifice fly when someone is trying to give you a free pass is still pretty impressive.
• HE’S CHRIS MAATHUIS … AND YOU’RE NOT: The Channel 8 sports anchor became the first local talking head to blast someone on the air (the Mountain West Conference for not getting around to bestowing player of the week honors on UNLV’s Tre’Von Willis until now) since Ron Futrell. Then Maathuis displayed some Weekend Update creativity in putting together a bit on UNLV sports in which the punch lines were excerpts from President Obama’s State of the Union address. Watch out, Amy Poehler.
• NORWAY OR THE HIGHWAY: Shay Stephenson has become the second member of the Wranglers to quit for a pro hockey opportunity in Norway, joining Robbie Bina who gave in to the lure of Norwegian wood — guys who play hockey in Norway make much more money than guys who play hockey in Las Vegas — two weeks ago. I can’t decide whether these defections should be called Fiord Escapes or Fiord Explorers.
• BULL IN AN INDY CAR SHOP: The Indy Racing League has named Randy Bernard, the founder of Professional Bull Riders Inc., which hosts like 28 events in Las Vegas, to replace Tony George as chief executive officer. “I didn’t know anything about bull riding before we started (either),” said Bernard, who might get run over by Danica Patrick if he doesn’t watch where he is going. Which, I suppose, is better than his old job, where if he didn’t watch where he was going, he might step in something.
• THE BRYCE YOU PAY: Last year, it cost $5 to watch CSN play baseball. This year, it costs $8. Last year, the Coyotes’ roster did not feature 17-year-old phenom Bryce Harper of Las Vegas High. This year, it does. It would appear the media and the pro scouts and the autograph seekers aren’t the only ones trying to make a buck — or $3 — off Bryce Harper’s name.
Las Vegas Review-Journal columnist Ron Kantowski can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or 702-383-0352.