Invasion of the Body Snatchers

I just saw a television advertisement that John McCain said he approved. First there’s this still photo of Obama kinda scowling. And the words "tax and spend" come up next to the photo as a graphic. Then another photo of Obama, kinda frowning. Oh. He doesn’t look like a happy president at all. Nossirree. And the words "not ready" come up on the screen over that photo. Who would want a scowling, frowny-face president with unhappy graphics?  Not me!

In between the Obama photos are photos of John McCain smiling. In all of them, he’s smiling.

I’m voting for John McCain.

Well, I was. But then another television advertisement interrupted my situps while watching a TiVo’d episode of Family Guy. Barak Obama approved this one. Starts with this really cool picture of Obama and Biden. And, get this! Neither are wearing suit coats! And both have the top button of their shirts undone, with tie askew. And their sleeves are rolled up! And both are smiling! Wow.

Next comes a series of film clips in which John McCain purses his lips, looks up and to to his right while raising and lowering his eyebrows, swearing to god he’s NOT George Bush, Jr. And if that’s not enough, there’s this scolding, reproving narrator following John around. Sheista!  Who wants a president with so many film clips of indecisiveness and self-doubt about his identity constantly harrassed by an antagonist narrator?  Not me!

I’m voting for Barak Obama.

Well, I was. Here’s John’s voice again, telling me he approves this series of people saying they are Joe the Plumber. It’s like a really cool episode of I’ve Gotta Secret, or What’s My Line? They are ALL Joe the Plumber! And NONE of them want Barak to be the next president. Look, folks, THIS many schizophrenics CAN’T be wrong. Or right. Or is it wrong? You know what I mean.

I’m voting for John McCain.

Well, I was. Just saw this political advertisement with film clips of Barak Obama’s campaign travels. At each stop he says "The folks here in [blank]," and he fills in the blank with the name of the state he is in. And he doesn’t make one mistake! For example, he never says "Pennsylvania" while standing in Texas. And each time he says that sentence, the people cheer wildly. Clearly he admires all the people in all the states. Been a long time since you could say THAT about a president, huh?

I’m voting for Barak Obama.

Come to think of it, I’m a helpless subject in a Neurolinguistic Programming Experiment. I’ll probably vote for whosever television advertisement I see last.

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