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Literary Las Vegas: Michael Moss

Michael Moss was born and raised in Connecticut and earned a bachelor’s degree in English at Windham College in Vermont, where he was mentored by wrestling coach/English professor John Irving, author of “The Cider House Rules” and “The World According to Garp.”

Moss served in the military and began a teaching career in Florida. When money was tight, he added a job at Walmart to the mix. The Henderson resident taps all his occupations in a compilation of humorous anecdotes titled “May I Return the Flowers?”

The title was inspired by a Walmart experience where a man in the checkout line inquired if he could have a refund if he didn’t “get lucky tonight.” Moss replied that he wasn’t sure what the policy was but encouraged the man to go for it.

Excerpt from ‘May I Return the Flowers?’

When Does an Attorney’s Career Begin?

I requested a 4th grade girl to stop talking.

She said, “The Constitution entitles me to free speech.”

I replied, “Yes, it does, but there’s an amendment that entitles teachers to call parents at home.”

§

When I write the homework assignment on the board, as an example, I write “Due Date, 10/20.”

One time, a future lawyer in the 6th grade didn’t have his assignment, as he explained, “You didn’t write the year.”

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