Shaq-of- all-trades to conduct orchestra

Shaquille O'Neal has already gone to Harvard. For an encore, the Big Shamrock will become the Big Conductor for the Boston Pops.

The Boston Celtics' 7-foot-1-inch center will climb the podium, don a tailcoat and white tie and lead the orchestra in the Christmas classic "Sleigh Ride" during a holiday concert Monday at Boston's Symphony Hall.

The four-time NBA champion has been an instant fan favorite in Boston, where he posed as a Shaq-tue in Harvard Square for nearly an hour in October, in part because "I always wanted to tell people I went to Harvard."

O'Neal, who has dubbed the pool area at one of his homes Shaq-A-Pulco, also recently played Shaq-A-Claus for the 15th straight year for disadvantaged children.

The 38-year-old personally purchased gifts at Toys "R" Us and then helped load them onto a 7-ton Army truck for the Marine Corps Toys for Tots program.

All the 325-pound O'Neal wants for Christmas is another ring. And maybe a Shaq-A-Ribs.

■ THRASH NEEDS CASH -- The Atlanta Thrashers are getting desperate to sell tickets.

The team staged a fake police chase with its mascot on Wednesday to try to increase interest in the surging squad, which has won 10 of 13 games but ranks 28th in the NHL in attendance.

Officers apprehended Thrash after he supposedly stole a Zamboni from the team's practice facility in Duluth, Ga., and drove it down a busy highway outside Atlanta.

The Thrashers, who average fewer than 12,000 fans per game, said Thrash will be released from custody as soon as 5,000 more tickets are sold for their remaining December home games -- which means the mascot will probably spend the holidays in jail and might never be released.

But Thrash won't let his time behind bars ruffle his feathers. He's just grateful he wasn't a mascot for the California O.J. White Broncos.

■ DIRTY PLAYERS -- Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver Hines Ward and linebacker James Harrison are among the 50 dirtiest players in sports history, according to a list compiled by Complex.com.

Ward, ranked No. 28, is cited for a 2008 hit that broke Cincinnati Bengals linebacker Keith Rivers' jaw. Harrison, at No. 31, has been fined four times this season for various hits.

First on the filthy list is former NHL player Marty McSorley, who was suspended for a year and convicted of assault for hitting Vancouver Canucks left wing Donald Brashear in the head with his stick in 2000.

Former figure skater Tonya Harding is ranked No. 9 for her involvement in the attack on Nancy Kerrigan in 1994.

Assailants struck Kerrigan in the knee with a metal baton, leaving her injured and unable to compete in the U.S. Figure Skating Championships, which Harding won.

However, the website ranked the attack on Kerrigan only the second-most disturbing Harding-related clip. The most disturbing was her sex tape.

COMPILED BY TODD DEWEY
LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL