We’re No. 3! (In top 10 dying industries)

I picked up the receiver on my rotary dial phone in my double-wide trailer, put on a Tony Bennett album, and adjusted the bow tie on my rental tux at the news that the newspaper industry is the third-fastest dying industry in America, according to the research firm IBIS World and reported on the Wall Street Journal website.

But at least my job at the jute mill is safe.

What, it’s not safe?

Wired communication carriers were fading fastest, according to IBIS, followed by mills, newspaper publishing, apparel manufacturing, DVD and video rental shops, and manufactured home dealers.

Record stores and photofinishing shops are in the top 10, too, along with formal wear and costume rental stores.