Las Vegas offers a variety show

This weekend's best bets appeal to night owls and, apparently, transvestites.

• SCOTT WEILAND is the "host" of Privé nightclub Saturday at Planet Hollywood. Weiland's duties probably can be defined as: walking into the club. In other words, Scott Weiland will "attend," like everyone else there.

If you go, keep an eye on what he ingests. He's been to rehab about 40 times, by his estimation. He recently pleaded not guilty to another drug-DUI bust. And he split up with heinous Velvet Revolver to rejoin the excellent alternative-rock band Stone Temple Pilots.

Last week, a reporter asked Stone Temple Pilots, "What about the drugs?" Guitarist Dean DeLeo responded, "You got any?"

Yes, this reunion is going to work out flawlessly.

Privé opens at 10 p.m. Saturday. STP plays The Pearl at the Palms June 12.

• "PUFF-A-PALOOZA" is a good example of what has become of nightlife. You can't just open a lounge anymore. You have to go kraaazy.

"Puff-a-Palooza" is a 36-hour grand opening of a lounge/nightclub called Puff. That's right, tickets cost $36 for 36 hours. No, you can't sleep there.

Puff promises several dozen DJs, spinning progressive house, and tribal and tech house music. Then there's pole dancing, break dancers, belly dancers and aerial gymnasts.

Sadly, there also is a Dave Matthews cover band and a sunrise drum circle to help you inhale a hookah. Puke-a-palooza?

Doors open at 5 p.m. today at Puff, 1030 E. Flamingo Road.

• "VIVA LAS VEGAS ROCKABILLY WEEKENDER" is one of the best rockabilly parties of the year, lining up scads of old-school events, such as "jiving classes," a burlesque contest, dozens of bands and women in Betty Page hairdos.

Tickets for the whole weekend cost $125 at the door at the Gold Coast. Ballroom dancing stays open till 4 a.m. each day. Showroom acts go until 7 a.m.

• "WHAT A DRAG: A CHARITY DRAG SHOW" keeps things fraying along the fringe at Onyx Theatre. The charity is Vegas MPowerment, dedicated as "a social gathering place for young gay/bisexual men who are between 20 and 29 years of age." Kinda niche-y, don't you think?

The name of the show: "This is My First Time Doing Drag." Good luck with that, at 8 p.m. today at Onyx, 953 E. Sahara Ave. Tickets: $11.

Doug Elfman's column appears on Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays. Contact him at 383-0391 or e-mail him at delfman@reviewjournal.com. He also blogs at reviewjournal. com/elfman.