Pinterest becomes a way of life

“You should be on Pinterest.” “If you were on Pinterest, you wouldn’t have to ask me.” “Pinterest knows.”

I had heard those words enough times to suspect the social media site originated on a compound in Waco, Texas. Surely, there had to be a dude with a swastika for a third eye behind the “virtual pinboard,” as it’s called.

Despite — or perhaps because of — its cultish qualities, I finally surrendered last month and became a “pinner.” Now I must convert anyone and everyone who hasn’t yet discovered the true meaning of cyber life.

Sure, I’m a little late to the party. That’s because, from the outside, it didn’t look like my kind of party. So, you just scroll through a bunch of pictures, aka “pins,” and decide if you want to comment, like or repin them to your personal board? Wow, hope the cops don’t get called on that ragin’ good time.

I was too busy tweeting it up, Facebooking all night long and walking in, and quickly out of, an Instagram soiree. Until a work assignment led me to the door of Pinterest, where I’ve been genuflecting ever since.

Since we’re getting all churchy, here’s a confession: I haven’t felt this inspired since the days of Oprah. I’m talking confident, on-top-of-the-world Oprah, not desperate, please-don’t-let-my-network-go-under Oprah.

The same ambition her show encouraged can be found in the images posted on Pinterest. Along with the dreams that fueled that ambition.

Sound a little deep for the same source that teaches Kim Kardashian’s contouring? It is what you make it.

After all, this social media site understands there’s nothing wrong with preferring recipes the same way Lionel Richie liked his Sunday mornings. And without this place, I would have never known that simply placing the word “skinny” in front of anything edible makes it diet-friendly.

Skinny fried chicken smothered in skinny bacon grease tastes so much better washed down with a skinny double-fudge Oreo milkshake.

Whenever pinners feel the desire to actually be skinny, they just click on the ol’ “Health and Fitness” category. Here, you can stare at glutes, abdominals, triceps and other body parts so disciplined we call them by their actual muscle names. With workout regimes and at-home exercises attached, this page all but laces up your running sneakers and kicks you in your wannabe glutes with them.

Right about now it has to be sounding muy Pinteresante. (That’s a cute little phrase I created. Feel free to use it, with proper attribution, of course.)

The more I navigate the site, the more it makes perfect sense for me.

Inspiration boards used to decorate my bedroom walls, school lockers and kitchen refrigerators. When I’d break it off with another loser boyfriend, I’d cut and paste a bunch of those jeweler advertisements to poster boards. Nothing says true love like a brave man protecting his woman from a thunderstorm.

The idea is the same more than a decade later, but the aspirations are different. Not to mention my new inspiration board comes with a user name and password. Oh yeah, and a small but growing cult of 20 followers.

Contact Xazmin Garza at xgarza@reviewjournal.com or 702-383-0477. Follow her on Twitter @startswithanx.