THE WATER COOLER

Here are a few things in news, entertainment and popular culture that we've been talking about lately.

• President Barack Obama's speech to schoolchildren runs into heated opposition from conservatives. Who knew "study hard," "stay in school" and "follow your dreams" were linchpins of Socialist political philosophy?

• Penny slots are booming in Nevada's casinos. If the U.S. Mint ever comes out with the half-penny, it'll make New Year's Eve in Las Vegas look like a Puritan prayer meeting.

• Britney Spears unveils a new fragrance, "Circus." Because "Gas Station Restroom" was already taken.

• Jon and Kate Gosselin continue their war of words, with Jon saying he despises his soon-to-be-ex. It's all just a setup for a new show: "Jon Hates Kate Times 8."

•Former "The Price is Right" host Bob Barker hosts WWE's "Monday Night Raw." For some reason, his standard closer --"Have your pets spayed or neutered" -- never seemed more apropos.

•"Britain's Got Talent" sensation Susan Boyle will cover a Madonna song ("You'll See") on her debut album. Admit it: You were thinking "Like a Virgin."

JOHN PRZYBYS (jprzybys@reviewjournal.com)