Who Am I — Self Biography

Editor's note: Art Klinkenberg, father of Senior Airman Jason Klinkenberg, released this uncorrected paper his son wrote for a Psychology 101 course at the College of Southern Nevada on Jan. 30, three weeks before he shot and killed his wife, Crystal, and then killed himself in their North Las Vegas apartment. Art Klinkenberg found the document last week while searching through files on his son's laptop computer.

Jason Klinkenberg
PSY 101
30 January 2009

Who Am I -- Self Biography

My name is Jason Matthew Klinkenberg. And I was born; June 16, 1983 in Richmond, Kentucky at 11:47p.m... The very next day after, my Great Grandfather past away. So to my family I was considered God’s gift, for the loss of a great man (Arthur James Klinkenberg, Senior). He was a fighter pilot in the war. My father was in the USAF. So I was a military brat. I have an older brother and an older sister. My mother is a wonderful woman; she loves and cares for her family deeply.

As a baby I wasn’t always healthy. I had to have tubes put into my ears. I also had problems with my speech growing up. I had to go to special classes to help me with it.

We moved from Kentucky to Alaska, while I was still small. I started first grade there. I was held back, supposedly because of my reading capability and speech problems. But I didn’t really get along with my first grade teacher. So when the next year came, my mom home schooled me.

Then we moved to Montana, where I went to second grade at a real school again. We lived on a really small Air Force Base. School was about forty five minutes away from the base. The military parents (Active Duty ones) had to take turns each week, dropping us off twenty miles away from base to our bus stop and pick us up also each day. Then third grade came and I was sent to a bigger school, because they had classes that could help with my speech problems. During the winter at this big school, I broke my nose twice. My hands got stuck in my pockets and I slipped on the ice. Which made me break my nose? This probably led to some of my later problems. I’ll get to a little later in my life.

We then moved again. This time we moved during part of my third grade year. We moved to Dugway Proving Grounds, Utah. It’s an Army Post. Third grade ended and we went on vacation like every summer. Fourth grade came and I didn’t need anymore special classes. Then my dad retired from the Air Force. And we moved once again, this time to Georgia. My mother and my father both became managers of Shell Gas Stations. So my brother and sister and I didn’t see our parents that often after that. My brother worked at Hardee’s (a fried chicken place). During this time my brother would bring home food from work and my sister also helped raise me at this time. Then my father quit working at Shell and became a Swift truck driver. So again, we still didn’t see our parents that often. At this time I went through 5th and 6th grade.

Then one day we received a phone call from someone from Dugway Proving Grounds. This individual offered my dad a Government contract doing what he did while he was in the service. He was a Radar Tech. which means he marked and graded pilots on there accuracy. He also fixed radars when they would break. He still does this entirely, still to this day. So we moved again, right after I started seventh grade in Georgia.

Here we were again, back in Utah. My brother stayed in Georgia. He was in his senior year in High School. He wanted to graduate with his friends. But he got kicked out of High School. He had a huge problem with getting up in the morning. So he was always absent to his first period class, which he was passing. He was passing all of his classes with A’s and B’s. But the school still kicked him out. So he got his GED and then joined the Army National Guard.

While all of this was going on, my sister and I were going to the same school. She was a sophomore and I was in seventh grade. Since I knew we weren’t going to move for a long time or ever again. I started making real friends and reconnecting with old ones from my previous years from earlier on. Then summer came and we went on vacation like always. Weather it was camping, visiting family in Illinois, or family reunions in Wisconsin.

Then the 8th grade came and this was the year to start and make a name for myself. My Gym Teacher started calling me Klink. So now I had a nickname. I started getting popular. I never belonged to just one social group, I fit into them all. I got along with everyone.

My freshman year came and I started slacking in school. My grades started decreasing. About every other quarter my grades would change. Like 1st and 3rd quarter I’d have bad grades and 2nd and 4th quarter I would have good grades. The changes in grades pissed my father off really badly. During my freshman year I played Junior Varsity basketball. And after basketball season I tried out for track. I became a hurdler and long distance runner. Then one day during track practice, I pulled my groin. Two ambulances came to the track field to come get me. The EMTs came and put me on a stretcher. By this time the whole track team had gathered around. EMTs started checking me out. They just so happened to flash my package to everyone on the track team. And after that day I became even more popular to the females in school and to Army females on the Army Post. From that moment, I went to Prom with a senior every year. But after my injury I thought I’d never be able to do sports again. So I went out and got myself a couple of jobs. I became a bagger at the Commissary, a cashier/cook at the Army Chow Hall, I got a government contract cutting grass on the Army Post, and I delivered Army and Air Force Times around the Post.

Then my sophomore year came and I decided to try out again for basketball. I spent a month working out trying to prepare for sports. I made the team, but I told the coach to give my slot to someone else because I had jobs. My jobs were more important. Coach then asked me why I tried out for. I told him I wanted to see if I could perform at or better than I did my freshman year, which I did. So I went to work and did alright in school. I started dating a lot more at this point. I dated high school girls from my school, enemy schools, and Army women.

Junior year came and things went really well. I still worked after school and on weekends. I did pretty well in school. Hung out with friends and started experimenting with alcohol. Kept dating whoever crossed my path, but nothing to serious. My friends and I decided to play basketball for our Youth Center. Games were on Saturday. This worked out for me, because it didn’t interfere with work or school.

Then senior year came. I got elected Treasure of our senior class. But I decided to graduate early. I graduated with my class at the end of the year. But I got out early; right after my 1st quarter. Then I went to work full time. I’d work in the morning at the Chow Hall and in the evening I’d bag groceries at the Commissary. And I gave up on cutting grass and delivering newspapers.

Once the summer was over I signed up to join the USAF. I didn’t sign up just because my dad was retired USAF. I joined because my father raised his children to respect and honor this country. I love this country. And most of all, I respect and love the US Flag. It is the whole reason I joined. On October 15th 2002, I joined the USAF. And November 29th 2002 I graduated from Basic Military Training.

Then I went to Tech. School, where I got in trouble for having a naked girl in my dorm room. I receive a LOR (Letter of Reprimand) and UIF (aka a watch list). My stripes were withheld. When I got to Nellis AFB (18 Feb. 2003) I informed my supervision of what had happen in Tech. School. And proceeded to work hard and prove myself as a hard worker and not as a trouble maker.

On May 1st 2003, I was in a car accident. That broke my collar bone, dislocated my shoulder, and tore all the ligaments off my left shoulder. I also injured my lower back (herniated disc, that slipped into my spine, and cut off the nerve to my left leg), but it took me almost a year to prove that injury to the USAF. This all happen, when I was on my way back from Utah, after a four day weekend. During this ordeal I worked hard and earned the respect from my peers and leadership.

So when I hit this next snag in my military career. My leadership and peers helped me out of trouble. I got in trouble for underage drinking. All of their character statements saved me. I received another LOR and UIF, this all happened in January of 2004. Then March came and I received my first surgeries since I was a kid. March 8th 2004 I had my wisdom teeth pulled. And on March 12th 2004 I received my first back surgery. They cut away my herniated disc. It took me like ten months to recover from the surgery. The first month of recovery I went to Utah, where my parents took care of me. Once I returned from Utah, I went to physical therapy three times a week for about nine months. But for the first three months I didn’t work. Then for six months I was put on half days and light duty.

Then I deployed in July of 2005, where I continued to prove myself as a hard worker. And someone with good work ethic. I ran convoys in Iraq. We worked as Gun Trucks. Which means our job was to protect the truck drivers hauling cargo to other Bases. I worked as the LVC (Lead Vehicle Commander), driver, gunner, and/or sometimes as just a truck commander (TC).

Then on November 12th 2005 our convoy got hit. I was driving for the ACC (Assistant Convoy Commander) that day. We were hauling JP8 (Diesel) and the tractor in front of my gun truck got hit by an armor piercing RPG. So as we were trained, I went to the contact side. We got out, are gunner scanned the area, and the ACC radioed the situation to the CC (Convoy Commander). I went looking for the driver. I found the driver. He was on firer and screaming. Just when I was about to enter the fire and try to pull Daniel “Miami” Jurn out, but the ACC grabbed me by the vest and said there was nothing that we could do. So we stood there watching “Miami” burn to death. Then the ACC ordered me to call in the KIA (Killed in Action). So I did. The moment I did, I became even more depressed; because I could feel everyone in the convoys reaction.

Once I got done calling the KIA in, I noticed that there were two bobtails (tractors/18 wheelers w/out the trailer) to close to the fire. So I jumped in the one that was closest to the fire. Keep in mind I was never trained on a tractor yet. And they were manual transmission. I knew how to drive a manual, but not a tractor. When I put it in gear, thinking it was first gear. I wound up in reverse and went towards the fire. Just then another explosion happened. It freaked me out and I hurried and put it in another gear and took off. Once I moved the two bobtails, I had to move my gunner away from the fire. The flames were getting to hot and close to her. Then my CC radioed and I relayed the message to my ACC. The CC ordered us to move our gun truck two hundred yards behind the wreckage. And for me to take over as gunner, I was the ranking airman in my gun truck. The other airman was just a A1C and I am an SrA. And if something should happen while I’m in my gun truck by myself, I could make the decision of how far I would react to any situation. And the original gunner was a CLS (Combat Life Saver). So there I was by myself with a hundred or more Iraqi civilians wanting to get by or go by the wreckage. And I had to keep them back.

The fire finally burned out and the ACC and other personnel were able to recover what was left of Daniel “Miami” Jurn. Once we had him we continued on our way. We headed for the closest Air Base. It just so happened to be our sister battalion’s base.

So here we were at Speicher Air Base, where our leadership ordered us to spend the night at. Here we were stuck at our sister base reflexing on what happened. No one could sleep. And I started to notice these looks of disappointment from calling in the KIA in. It just seemed that I was the bad guy now. The next morning we left Speicher to get to Balad (our Base).

Once we got back to Balad and our shop. There was a bunch of people waiting for us; Battalion Commander, Base Chaplains, our Leadership, and the rest of our Battalion. And all they kept doing was asking us; “What happen?” or “How are you feeling?” All we wanted was to be left alone. Then a few days past and we were sent to the church on base to go and talk about our feelings to the Chaplains. No one wanted to open up. So we went back to our cans (aka trailers).

Then out of the blue my flight MSgt came up to me and threaten to kick my head off my shoulders if I didn’t pull myself together. I had a nervous break down and went off on him. He took my weapon and sent me to see a specialist on Base. So I went to the specialist, who was a full bird Colonel. I told him what was going on and he sent me back to regular duty and order that my weapon to be returned to me.

After that my 1st Sgt removed me from Alpha flight and put me back on Bravo flight. With the squad I trained with. Bravo flight welcomed me back and I returned back to the road. But now I was strictly a truck commander for the rear gun truck. Which was alright with me?

As our deployment came close to an end, my new squad and I brought our Battalion Convoys to an end with doing our 4 millionth miles convoyed. During my deployment my back got re-injured and also went out about 5 times or more.

We returned from Iraq. We landed in Las Vegas and my whole family was there waiting for me. It was a wonderful surprise. Since I had such a large group waiting for me, I was interviewed by reporters. It was cool. Once we were in processed back to Nellis, we were able to go on leave. I spent time with my family in Utah and also in Illinois. Then when I got back to regular duty again the job didn’t feel like it was important. I started missing Iraq, convoys, and being shot at. Weird I know. But Life Skills said it is normal. I was then diagnosed with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). And went through an MEB in August 2006. But my MEB got sent back, because the board said there wasn’t enough information.

Then 2007 came and it seemed to be the year of surgeries. First I received throat surgery June 2007. Then I received an electro stimulator to help my back problems in July 2007. I also found the love of my life July 2007 and got married. Then the MEB board called me back to Texas to say I was going to be medically discharge (November 2007). Then I received nose surgery for my deviated septum December 2007. This surgery and my throat surgery were for my sleep apnea.

January 2008, I thought I was going to be released from the USAF. I was told I would we discharged on the 15th of January. This was the day before my third back surgery. I received a disc replacement in my lower back. They replaced the disc from my first back surgery that they had only cut away. This surgery didn’t require much recovery time afterwards. In fact I almost feel like I could do all the things I use to do when I was younger and not injured.

As 2008 continued, my life had a lot of ups and downs. But I was able to come to grips with some of my PTSD problems. This helped me a lot. I became more up beat and less depressed. My first year of marriage came and went. But it would never be able to be forgotten.

Now it is 2009. This year I’ve gone snowboarding about four or five times. Also is the first time in over six years, I’ve been snowboarding. My back surgeon advised me that I needed to try and do the things I use to. Or I’d never recover from my injuries. But he did remind me of the cautions to watch for. And it is the first time since high school that I’ve gone or done schooling. This is pretty overwhelming. But I am trying. I just hope to achieve my goals and wishes for my wife and myself.