AAU teams get quirky with names

In addition to selfish jump shots and parents shouting at overworked referees, one of the great traditions of AAU basketball season is seeing team names that make less sense than "Las Vegas Locomotives."

One can only imagine what went through UNLV coach Dave Rice's mind as he navigated a circus that showcased 1,040-plus AAU teams in town last week.

The team names read like fantasy football league standings.

They can be pompous (Infinite Ability), misspelled for no apparent reason (Club Venim Gold), pay tribute to a Martin Scorsese movie (Mean Streets Ross), pay tribute to a horrible movie (Chicago Transformers), juxtapose a city and mascot (Dallas Hoyas) or even sound like they were named after a "Star Wars" robot (DJH5 17).

Some are named after bad rap groups (ICP Red) and some after good rap groups (BlackStar Legends). Some even pay tribute to Borat (High Five America).

A team called Truth Trojans played in the Las Vegas Fab 48, but it couldn't be confirmed whether Shawn Kemp coached from the opposing bench.

■ NEVER TOO YOUNG - It can be difficult enough to generate accurate rankings of high school players, but The HOOP SCOOP Online starts much younger.

"Ranging from fifth-year players all the way down to sixth, seventh and eighth graders, it's a joke how far ahead we are of the competition," brags one of 13 reasons on its website why visitors should subscribe to the members section.

It costs only $499 per year to view the rankings.

According to JamOnIt.info, registering a third-grade team to play in the recent Las Vegas Classic at the Las Vegas Convention Center took $600.

Both deals sound like bargains.

■ EXPENSIVE PAPER - It isn't only parents being bamboozled by the big-business AAU circuit.

One of the traditions of media check-in at various tournaments is watching college coaches shill out hundreds of dollars to pay for all-important packets, which are filled with player phone numbers and addresses.

You might see college coaches leave soda or water bottles behind when they leave a gym, but their beloved packets often are clutched as tightly as a Dennis Rodman rebound.

■ AGENTS OF CHAOS - Earlier this summer, the NCAA banned the adidas-sponsored Florida Rams from playing in July because team organizers had ties to a professional agent.

But that was no big deal. Players from that team simply jumped ship to form Florida Elite, which played in the adidas Super 64.

In July 2009 at the now-defunct Reebok Summer Championships, a man who identified himself as an agent asked a Review-Journal reporter for a list of player phone numbers. The reporter declined.

Many middlemen sneak into AAU tournaments by filling out fabricated media credential requests.

But it shouldn't be hard for officials to tell the difference between agents and sports writers. The agents are the ones who dress nice.

COMPILED BY TRISTAN AIRD
LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL