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Church of Twain: St. Mark and his beloved … football

In November 1900, Mark Twain saw his first college football game, a skirmish between Yale and Princeton. The New York World noted Twain’s presence, and the writer Laurence Hutton took notes of St. Mark’s occasional observations. (The story is reprinted on the remarkable twainquotes.com Web site.)

Here are a few one-liners you won’t hear uttered on ESPN:

- “Well, say, this beats croquet.”

- "I should think they'd break every bone they ever had!"

- "Those Yale men must be made of granite, like the rocks of Connecticut!"

- "That Yale team could lick a Spanish army!"

- "The country is safe when its young men show such pluck and determination as are here in evidence to-day."

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