GOP crowd gets fired up by Trump’s expletive-filled speech

He had them at "@#$%*!"

Billionaire real estate developer and reality TV star Donald Trump provided no shortage of epithets and tough-guy patter Thursday night as he wowed a capacity crowd at Treasure Island. It was the latest stop on his Trump on the Stump Tour into the frustrated heart of the Republican Party, which continues its search for a candidate capable of unseating President Barack Obama.

Given his messy personal life and controversial business history, Trump isn't that candidate. The fact he leads in the polls says more about the turmoil inside the GOP than about his chances of winning the White House. Although Trump assured all present he will decide before June 1, his candidacy would provide an all-you-can-eat buffet for opposition researchers and investigative reporters.

But let's not let reality distract us from the Trump on the Stump Show. For the nearly 1,000 faithful Republicans who gathered and guffawed, this was more than comic relief. It was a sign that a rich celebrity business mogul felt their pain and shared their anger.

Members of Republican Party women's clubs that would have washed out a cursing member's mouth with a bar of Irish Spring roared with approval at Trump's epithet-laced diatribe. Until Thursday, I didn't know "mother(expletive)" was a priceless punch line.

Trump's current events-themed routine was reminiscent of Will Rogers -- if the great American humorist had never met a man he liked. Trump's take: Politicians are stupid and weak, and foreigners are ruining this no-longer-great country.

ObamaCare is a disaster, and the American legal system is overrated: "Why do we have to let it go through the lower court? Why don't we just let it go right to the Supreme Court?"

China's currency manipulation is killing our economy and must be ordered to stop or face a "25 percent tax" on its goods: "They are abusing this country like we've never been abused before, except of course for OPEC. I have them as a special category."

As for Saudi Arabia, "They want to go in and raise the price of oil because we have nobody in Washington that sits back and says, 'You're not going to raise that (expletive) price.' "

Cheers erupted throughout the hall.

A tough guy, that Trump. He's a real Dirty Hairdo.

He also had choice words for the Libyans, North Koreans, South Koreans, and Iranians, too.

Fortunately, Trump has a plan to put the world's outlaws and chiseler nations in their place. Namely, talk tough and issue ultimatums. In Trump's worldview, foreign policy is a job Clint Eastwood could handle on his lunch hour.

Governing isn't hard, Trump assured them. It's easy. Just put those foreign leaders around the big conference table and tell them how the (expletive) cow ate the (expletive) cabbage. If they don't like it, they're (expletive) fired. In other words, it's essentially an uncensored version of "The Apprentice."

At times birther hero Trump sounded like a barroom lout in a fancy tie, but the crowd ate it up. And who can blame them for wanting to suspend their disbelief and escape the grim realities of today's economy, deficit, and tumultuous world stage?

After acknowledging the force of Trump's personality by producing the long form of his birth certificate, Obama this past week characterized The Donald as a media "carnival barker." I hear the International Carnival Barkers Union is considering picketing Trump's next appearance because he is behind on his dues but ahead in the polls.

Much like Democrats who followed Obama, the Republicans in 2011 are hungry for change as they define it. But where Obama's rhetoric painted sweeping landscapes of hope and optimism, Trump sprays graffiti.

Republicans long for leadership. The fact so many were taking Trump seriously Thursday tells me their search continues.

John L. Smith's column appears Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. E-mail him at Smith@reviewjournal.com or call 702-383-0295. He also blogs at lvrj.com/blogs/smith.