Who is to blame for this cycle of random and wicked violence? We are.

The entire nation is reeling yet again as we grieve over the senseless shooting of Charlie Kirk on the campus of Utah Valley University just two weeks following the heartbreaking school shooting at a Christian elementary school in Minnesota. Our collective grief, once again, is matched only by our disbelief and weariness. How is this still happening? How many more people, let alone children, must die from gunshots before we confront the root of the problem and choose, finally, to act?

What happened in Utah and at Annunciation School are just the latest tragic episodes in a grotesque national pattern. And while we instinctively search for someone to blame — the shooter, the school, the system, the politicians — the truth is, we are all responsible.

Our culture has become dangerously desensitized to violence. Children grow up immersed in media that glamorizes brutality and devalues life. Movies, music, video games, and online platforms pump out a steady stream of violence that is normalized and, worse, monetized. These aren’t just harmless outlets of entertainment. They shape young minds. They set expectations. They influence behavior.

This isn’t a new concern. Back in the 1980s, Tipper Gore — wife of then-Sen. Al Gore — launched a campaign to raise awareness of explicit content in music. She was joined across the aisle by Republican Susan Baker, wife of Treasury Secretary James Baker. Together, they warned that America’s youth were being corrupted by violent and pornographic media. They were ridiculed at the time. But history has proven them prescient.

Fast-forward to today, and their warnings ring truer than ever. But now the volume and intensity of violent media have multiplied exponentially, and the tools to access it are in every child’s pocket. It’s no longer enough to blame poor parenting or isolated mental illness. We must also reckon with the cultural environment that surrounds our children — one that numbs their empathy and feeds their darkest impulses.

We also cannot ignore the role of social media, where bullying, shaming and nihilism flourish in the absence of oversight or meaningful connection. Children are growing up in digital echo chambers that distort reality, inflame emotions, and normalize cruelty. In such a world, tragedy doesn’t just happen — it festers.

So what can we do?

We must summon the courage to reassert the time-tested teachings of Jesus of Nazareth (however you view that historical person, whether as teacher, prophet or Lord) Look at His moral guidelines, not as old fashioned religious dogma, but as the revolutionary principles that put evil on notice and reset the course of history. Underscore the fact that there is right and wrong. Good and bad. We need to apply those universal morals in our homes, schools, churches, workplaces and communities. That means teaching our kids that life is sacred. That violence is never entertainment. That every human being has dignity. And that kindness and loving our neighbors (and enemies) is a form of great strength.

It means holding news media companies accountable for the content they promote — not through censorship, but through civic and consumer pressure. We’ve done it before. We can do it again.

It means recognizing that we’re not powerless — unless we choose to be. We can advocate for better mental health resources, safer school environments, and stronger community ties. We can model compassion in our own lives and refuse to be passive participants in a culture of cruelty.

Most of all, it means refusing to look away. And to pray. The cycle of violence in our schools and in the public square is not inevitable. It reflects the values we tolerate, the warnings we ignore, and the responsibilities we avoid. If we want different results, we must become a different people — much more engaged, much less tolerant of the titillating violence so openly flaunted in media, much more courageous in confronting it, and more united in our defense of the minds of the next generation. Because if we don’t set a new, higher, standard, then who will?

Ward Brehm, former business owner in Minneapolis and humanitarian, received the Presidential Citizens Medal from President G.W. Bush for his extensive work in Africa and is the author of five books.