Pity the old-timer who, after seeing the posters and only half-watching the commercials, buys a ticket for “A Million Ways to Die in the West” without even a passing awareness of its co-writer, director and star, Seth MacFarlane. The poor guy may never leave his Barcalounger again.
Considering that “Crossbones” is being marketed as a Blackbeard drama, it’s fairly disappointing that John Malkovich’s Blackbeard is around for less than 12 minutes of the premiere.
The Disney movie turns the tables on the studio’s 1959 animated classic — and undoes most of what you know and love about it — with this wildly revisionist live-action tale that creates a backstory for its most popular villain.
It’s not edgy. It’s not flashy. It doesn’t break any new ground.
“The Night Shift” is like the medical equivalent of the network’s “Chicago Fire”: pretty people you barely care about saving the lives of less-pretty people you don’t care about at all while you pay bills, fold laundry or play with your phone.
“Little Women: L.A.” (10 p.m. Tuesday, Lifetime) follows six little people living in Los Angeles.
Somewhere, there’s a family that’s the target audience for “Blended.”
The cable channel is airing a marathon of 34 movies honoring servicemen and servicewomen, ranging from 1926’s World War I comedy-drama “The Better ‘Ole” to Clint Eastwood in 1970’s “Kelly’s Heroes.”
Now that’s how you make a summer blockbuster! There’s more sheer tonnage of awesomeness in the first 10 minutes of “X-Men: Days of Future Past” than in the entirety of “The Amazing Spider-Man 2.”
The drama, debuting Thursday, follows a detective who’s torn between his duties as a member of L.A.’s Gang Task Force and his ties to the neighborhood gang of his youth.
Considering that he’s capable of cranking out bajillion-dollar juggernauts like the first two “Iron Man” movies, you can’t expect the writer-director to think small. Still, it would be nice if he did it more often than every other decade.
“I Wanna Marry ‘Harry,’ ” debuting at 9 p.m. Tuesday on KVVU-TV, Channel 5, tricks 12 extremely gullible American women into thinking they’re dating Prince Harry. The results are hilariously evil.
Going into Monday’s last dances on “Dancing With the Stars,” Johnny Avello, director of race and sports operations at Wynn Las Vegas, has listed Amy Purdy, the Cimarron-Memorial grad, and her parter, Derek Hough, the favorites at 7-5.
“Locke” is just 85 minutes of Tom Hardy driving a BMW from Birmingham to London. And it’s terrific.
Opponents of the Yucca Mountain nuclear waste repository may have their most convincing argument yet: “Godzilla.”
