THE WATER COOLER

Here are a few things in news, entertainment and popular culture that we've been talking about lately.

* Rumor has it that Las Vegas may be home to a topless version of the Mona Lisa. What's really creepy is that Las Vegas also may be home to a nude version of "American Gothic."

* The "Today" show's Al Roker calls reality show half-wits Heidi and Spencer Pratt out, putting every other "celebrity journalist" in America to shame. And a weatherman shall lead them.

* America finally upgrades from analog to digital TV. Unfortunately, no upgrade planned for TV programming.

* A conservative author starts FireDavidLetterman.com because of Letterman's joke about Sarah Palin's daughter. Might as well just call it DavesBestPublicityEver.com.

* Kraft Foods Australia is giving Vegemite, the brewer's yeast-based food spread, a makeover. In: Flavor. Out: That tantalizing salty topsoil taste.

* The former chairman of the South Carolina elections commission likens a gorilla to (honest) one of Michelle Obama's ancestors. If this is "evolution," we're with the gorillas.

JOHN PRZYBYS (jprzybys@reviewjournal.com)