THE WATER COOLER

Here are a few things in news, entertainment and popular culture that we've been talking about lately.

• Elvis impersonators tell the R-J's Norm Clarke that the recession is hurting business. Factor in the jumpsuit dry cleaning bills and it's a surprisingly high-overhead occupation.

• Ventriloquist Terry Fator opens at The Mirage. Our suggestion: Work a Criss Angel puppet into the act. It would barely need a voice. Just lots of annoying attitude.

• Levi Johnston says he hopes he and ex-fiancee Bristol Palin can reconcile one day. Pencil in "the day hell freezes over."

• Japanese researchers create a robot that mimics fashion model movements. Who needs a robot that smokes, vomits and looks sullen all the time?

• Jon Stewart schools CNBC pundit Jim Cramer on financial journalism. And, somewhere, Jonathan Swift smiles.

• Miley Cyrus gets into a feud with Radiohead. From Mick versus Keith to Tupac versus Biggie to ... this?

• Ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff goes to jail. Every time a white-collar criminal goes to jail, an angel get its wings.

By JOHN PRZYBYS