LEFTOVERS: Coach goes extra mile to wax poetic over holiday
The anti-Bill Belichick, Louisiana State football coach Les Miles is as colorful as they come. The man eats blades of grass off the field.
“I have a little tradition that humbles me as a man, that lets me know that I’m part of the field and part of the game,” Miles said in 2010 after a win over Alabama. “You should have seen some games before this. I can tell you one thing: The grass in Tiger Stadium tastes best.”
Former LSU wide receiver Russell Shepard confirmed the coach’s strange eating habits.
“I see him do it every day,” he said. “That’s Coach Miles. He eats that grass.
“I guess he says it has a lot of protein.”
Miles probably didn’t have time to make his famous grass blade casserole today; at Monday’s news conference, he said he was downright dumbfounded the holiday was already upon us.
“Happy Thanksgiving! Did it come quickly? I don’t know what happened. I don’t know how it happened,” he said. “I mean, really, it just seemed like months flew by, and suddenly — maybe it didn’t where you’re at, but where I’m at — it just (snapping fingers) happened so fast.
“We have a lot to be thankful for: the health of our families, relationships that we’ve built over time. I think we all need to take stock.”
Miles continued to wax poetic about the holiday when asked about his favorite part of the Thanksgiving feast.
“I am the easiest man to please when it comes to food,” the grass-fed Miles said. “I have to be honest, I think it’s definitely the turkey with warm gravy, maybe the last spoon or fork of food on the plate. It has a little bit of salt and pepper and maybe a little bit of the turkey and gravy and some of the stuffing and maybe a smidgen of the cranberry stuff. That right there — oh, my goodness, right? — that last bite’s worth a lot.
“I might add the turkey sandwich, with mayonnaise, mustard and onions, and a little lettuce, kind of makes for good eating later.”
It’s easy to see how Miles motivated the Tigers to win the 2007 Bowl Championship Series national title. He already has us fired up to eat today — not that that’s a tough task — and we can’t wait to hear him pontificate about pies.
The coach also gets excited about obscure holidays.
“I want to remind everybody that it’s Columbus Day,” he said on Oct. 14. “All those of you who know Italians and like Italians or people who might venture onto a ship and travel to explore and find new lands — this is your day!”
On second thought, Miles might do more with grass than just eat it.
■ PRICELESS ADVICE — Tampa Bay Rays pitcher David Price fired a brushback pitch at women everywhere Tuesday,when he dispensed politically incorrect advice on his Twitter account.
“Everyone thats traveling for thanksgiving please be careful!” he wrote. “Driving conditions will be rough with these storms! Ladies…let ur man drive!”
Unless Price prepares dinner today, he might go hungry.
COMPILED BY TODD DEWEY LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL
