What do you get for the NFL quarterback who has it all?
Apparently, you get him bath towels, crystal toasting flutes and a jerky maker from Bed, Bath & Beyond.
You know, if you have enough time.
The Washington Post recently posted the Bed, Bath & Beyond wedding registry for Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III and his fiancee, Rebecca Liddicoat, and fans since have purchased most of the 208 items on the list.
Griffin tweeted a thank-you note to his fans Sunday and included a photo of himself posing in front of a pile of empty boxes.
The former Heisman Trophy winner later responded to the apparent backlash he received from people who objected to fans purchasing gifts for a rich professional athlete.
“I didn’t ask the fans to buy me anything,” he wrote. “They found it on their own and decided to get what they could. SMH (shaking my head) at all these Debbie downers.”
He also tweeted, “Because you are rich you are not allowed to receive gifts and any gifts you receive should be donated to charity???? #WOW Smh …”
We’re still shaking our heads in amusement at his use of the phrase “Debbie downers.” Clearly, RG3 is not someone who considers himself a Mr. Fancy Pants.
His innocence almost made us consider buying the bread maker on his list — but, considering Griffin has a $21 million contract, he already makes enough.
■ PASTED BY PASTRY — Reds closer Aroldis Chapman served up solo homers to Erik Kratz and Freddy Galvis on Sunday in the ninth inning of Cincinnati’s 3-2 loss to the Philadelphia Phillies.
The hard-throwing left-hander’s meltdown can be attributed to melt-in-your-mouth Cuban pastries, according to the Phillies’ Spanish-language broadcaster, Rickie Ricardo, who brought Chapman 100 of them before the game.
“It’s equivalent of the Krispy Kreme doughnuts when they come right out of the oven, it’s that kind of a thing,” said Ricardo, no relation to Desi Arnaz. “Could you imagine cream cheese and guava on a baked pastry?
“When I saw (Chapman) on Sunday morning before the game, he was in the clubhouse, he had just eaten about 18 of them. He couldn’t breathe! I looked at my partner, I said, ‘He’s ripe for the taking today.’ ”
The next time the Reds play the Phillies, Chapman better steer clear of Ricardo, or else he’ll have some ’splainin’ to do.
■ THE INVISIBLE WOMAN — Manti Te’o’s fake girlfriend, Lennay Kekua, is hotter than ever more than four months after it was revealed she didn’t exist.
Kekua recently was ranked No. 69 on Maxim magazine’s list of the world’s 100 hottest women, and on Thursday the Florence (Ky.) Freedom, an independent minor league baseball team, is giving away free Kekua bobblehead dolls — disguised as empty boxes.
To shield Te’o from more questions about the hoax, the San Diego Chargers have barred their rookie linebacker from speaking to the media. Don’t blame Te’o, then, when the imaginary reporter to whom he’s been talking every day breaks his heart.
COMPILED BY TODD DEWEY
LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL