We’re lousy drivers, but that’s nothing to joke about

You've heard the story about the man who drove down an off-ramp against one-way traffic for miles before noticing? Maybe you heard about the couple who left their baby on the roof of their car while they cruised down the freeway? And the story about the trucker who took the words "drive thru" just a little too literally?

"Yes, we really are bad drivers."

That was a recent headline on the front page of our local paper.

Really, I ask you. Was there ever any doubt?

I mean, a 15-minute commute to work on any given day could pretty much confirm that.

But seeing those words in inch-tall type begs you to read the article, if for no other reason than to start your day with a good chuckle over this crazy story that stated the obvious.

The story explained that a national poll proved we're a society of lead-foots who run red lights and have an inane fear of using signal lights.

That's the short list of flaws.

It's not exactly news, although one news wire certainly seemed to think so.

The research company that conducted the poll allowed a margin of error of plus or minus 3.1 percent.

Having said that, 14 percent of respondents admitted they use their commuting time for grooming purposes: applying makeup, combing their hair or shaving (it appears the poll was open to both men and women). Another 67 percent confessed that a yellow light simply means "go faster."

Here's a number that's a little more relevant ... and newsy: 72 percent of drivers said that the frustration of following a distracted driver is the cause of their aggressive driving.

The poll results became fodder for morning radio jocks who found the article equally as amusing.

"Is that the worst they could come up with?" asked one caller, making light of the poll's conclusions.

He had a point.

In all seriousness, many of us are fortunate to live in areas with people who are generally unfamiliar with the definition of road rage. Heck, the most serious incidents I've personally witnessed involved an outstretched finger and an assortment of expletives mumbled in passing through a window. And that was my dad.

Yeah, some drivers don't remember the rules of the road, much less adhere to them. That's nothing new.

We've become so accustomed to seeing drivers, presumably with valid licenses, cruise through a red light or not turn left when the little green arrow is lit, that it's no longer something to curse about.

If I had a buck for every time I saw a driver not use his or her turn signal, I would be driving a Porsche. A new Porsche.

The day after I read the story, I was hit with another example of how, as the headline proclaimed, "We really are bad drivers."

It should have read that some people "really are bad drivers who think they own the road."

I was stopped at a red, behind a sexy little convertible. While I admired the car, its passengers used the time at the lights to dispose of their waste: first, burger wrappers were tossed out the window, then fry containers with the spuds still in the container.

Bad drivers? I could think of a few more less lady like adjectives to describe some of the wannabe Jeff Gordons who have cut me off.

On the annoyance scale, that rates maybe a 3.2. But for one school crossing guard who was interviewed for the story, bad drivers are more than an annoyance. They're a serious threat.

On a daily basis this woman, clad in a fluorescent orange vest visible from nearby planets, is a target for drivers who barrel through school zones, narrowly missing her and the children she's there to help safely get to school.

"Drivers just don't pay attention anymore," she said. "And that scares me."

Once the jokes cleared and the findings of the poll could be seen for what they were, the article stated that all the silly auto related idiosyncrasies, such as applying makeup or booking tee times on cell phones while driving, contribute to crashes that result in injury or death.

That might not come as a surprise to anyone and although we complain about it, when are we going to do something about it? Shouldn't it be the exception rather than a mere fact of life?

Rhonda Wheeler is a journalist with Wheelbase Media, a worldwide supplier of automotive news, features and reviews. You can email her by logging on to www.wheelbasemedia.com and clicking the contact link.