I agreed with comedian Christopher Titus the minute he said this: “I’m always afraid to meet reality stars. About 90 percent of the time, every reality star I have met was a raging (expletive). I mean, people that make Courtney Love look like a sweetheart.”
Like who? Titus, who performs all new material Friday and Sunday at South Point, is talking about people from “The Bachelorette,” “Jersey Shore” and “Real World,” for starters. (But he and I both like Pauly D, FYI.)
Titus was a little nervous to meet Rick Harrison, Austin “Chumlee” Russell, Corey Harrison of “Pawn Stars.”
“But it turns out, when I meet them, I’m the (expletive). They’re so much more well-adjusted than I am. They’re really great guys.”
Titus is the host of the new spinoff game show, “Pawnography,” debuting July 10 on the History Channel. Contestants attempt to out-remember the “Pawn Star” cast about “Pawn Star” trivia.
Titus said Chumlee gave him a valuable celebrity reminder while they were shooting the first episode in a Vegas studio.
“I was trying to read the prompter, and do my jokes, and be funny. The tech guys kept going, ‘Stop, Titus, hold on, we’ve gotta fix this.’ It was really irritating. About the 50th time it happened, I was about to kill myself,” Titus said.
“I’m standing there with Rick, Corey and Chumlee, and I’m whining about it: ‘I wish they would let me get my job done. It’s so hard to do this.’ ”
At that point, Chumlee turned to Titus, all friendlylike, and said: “You know, when I was a teenager, they sent me to work on my uncle’s lumber mill. I had to carry 100-pound logs up a hill.”
Just then, a show worker walked up to Titus and handed him a fresh cold water. Titus looked at the water and felt like a fool for complaining.
“I said to Chumlee, ‘I bet they didn’t bring you a bottle of water, did they?’ He said, ‘Nope.’ It was very clear what a (expletive) I was sounding like at that minute. And he did it without saying, ‘Shut up, Titus.’ It was really cool.”
Titus said Chumlee is “weirdly brilliant in his own way.”
“He knows who he is, and he knows what his part is,” Titus said of Chumlee. “One of the prizes was this one-tenth scale steam train. And Chumlee turns to Rick and goes, ‘Rick, where do you put the steam in?’ We all just looked at him. That’s exactly what he’s supposed to do.”
After that, Titus, who plays guitar but didn’t bring one to Vegas, asked Rick whether he could borrow a guitar. Rick gave him a Gibson. Titus Googled the Gibson and was shocked it was worth $2,700.
When Titus tried to return the guitar to Rick after they dined at Nobu, Rick told him to keep the Gibson, even though Titus said he couldn’t possibly keep it. Rick kept insisting.
“So I took it,” Titus said. “Then I went to the guy at Nobu and said, ‘Give me the bill.’ That was a mistake, because Rick has a taste for very nice liquor. That bill was $1,300. But I still got a good deal on a $2,700 guitar,” Titus said and laughed.
“The good thing about those guys is they’re real guys. They’re not putting it on. That’s what I liked more than anything about them.”
Although, that doesn’t mean the “Pawn Stars” guys are to be trifled with. On the game show, Rick “rips on people who are (expletives),” Titus said.
“It was cool to watch who Rick is. If you’re a good dude, he’s cool with you. If you’re not, he turns into Batman,” Titus said. “He wants to take down the (expletives)!”
Doug Elfman’s column appears Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. Email him at firstname.lastname@example.org. He blogs at reviewjournal.com/elfman.