Monday, March 31, 2003
Copyright © Las Vegas Review-Journal

OPPOSITE SHIFTS: The family workout

Some couples enjoy the convenience of working different hours to benefit their families

Illustration by David Stroud. Norm and Dawn Blinder, who work opposite shifts, give each other a passing kiss as their children, Debbie, 6, and Steven, 2, look on. Photo by Craig L. Moran.

Norm Blinder switched work to a night shift when son Steven, now 2, was born.

When should he shift back to days, Norm recently asks his wife, Dawn.

"Oh, when the kids graduate from high school," she replies with a laugh, though she is also earnest.

Many Las Vegas couples work opposite shifts, particularly those with a partner employed in a 24-hour field such as gaming or health care.

"It's a lifestyle, but it could be better. Somebody's always sleeping at our house," says one local woman who works a shift opposite her husband's, but doesn't enjoy the routine. She declined to be identified for fear their home could be targeted if criminals knew she often is home alone. The husband and wife both work on the Strip, in different casinos.

The Blinders, in contrast, prefer opposing work schedules. They see the lifestyle as a plus for the family, which includes toddler Steven and daughter Debbie, 6.

Norm, 41, is a pit manager at the Venetian. He works what casinos here call swing shift, 8 p.m. to 4 a.m.,

in counterpoint to Dawn's daytime schedule as a teacher at a public year-round elementary school.

"We had to sit down and discuss the ramifications," is how Dawn, 34, recalls their joint decision for Norm to switch from days. The change did not bring him a pay raise, though it did lower their childcare costs.

On the down side, Norm doesn't get "straight sleep. He's going to have interrupted sleep," Dawn explains.

When Norm gets home after 4 a.m., he grabs a maximum three hours of shut-eye, then has to be up to get Debbie to school; Dawn has already left the house.

After shuttling Debbie to Desert Torah Academy, a private school, Norm does family errands with Steven in tow. The two also participate in morning activities at a neighborhood recreation center.

Norm is used to defying the norm. One morning dance class changed its title after the Blinder males enrolled, from something on the order of "mommy and me" to "parent and child," he notes with a chuckle.

"Do you work?" one woman asked after noticing him participating frequently in daytime field trips and other activities at Debbie's school.

Finally, after lunch when Steven is napping, Norm gets to sleep again for several more hours.

On the up side, "It offers me the opportunity of bringing up my son," Norm says.

"I tell him he's got the best of both worlds," Dawn jokes. "He gets to work. He gets to be the stay-at-home dad."

When firstborn Debbie was a toddler, the Blinders kept her in home care with a licensed provider they greatly trusted while both worked days. After the provider decided to get out of childcare, the Blinders chose opposite shifts instead of the arduous search for new, trustworthy home care.

The lifestyle will get harder as Steven grows out of taking naps. But Dawn is also home regularly for several weeks at a time, during school track breaks.

"You know, when you're in a relay race (and hand off the baton to a teammate)? I feel like, day to day, that's what we do," Dawn concludes.

Jay and Hadassa Lefkowitz of Las Vegas, both 36, are running a similar household relay. They have two school-age children, Alyson, 10, and Sammy, 6.

Hadassa, also, is a teacher at a year-round elementary school. Jay is in his first year as a certified nursing assistant, working nights at a local nursing home. Healthcare shifts are usually 12 hours long, so Jay works four days a week. When the nursing home's staff is low, however, "I'll pull a double (shift) on the weekend," he adds.

Like Norm Blinder, Jay splits his sleep in two short stints. During weekday daylight, he is up to ferry his kids to and from school and do family chores. "If I get to sleep before 10 a.m., it's a good day," he admits.

The Lefkowitzes think their schedule -- commenced in January when Jay closed his own food-sales business to enter health care -- is stretching their children in a good way, allowing them to become more self-reliant.

Alyson, agrees. Dad is teaching her to cook some, using the microwave oven. Sometimes she supervises Sammy while Dad is sleeping.

The Lefkowitzes' routine is apt to get more complicated before it gets simple again. Hadassa expects to complete her last coursework for a doctorate in early childhood development by the end of summer, to be followed by the research and writing of her dissertation. As Hadassa's program winds down, Jay expects to ramp up his education to one day earn a nursing degree.

"We have a saying, 'This too shall pass,' " Jay says of the couple's intricately timed daily schedule, a computer printout that is posted on the family refrigerator, and updated as needed.

They hope eventually to work similar shifts, but in the meantime rely on communication and other relationship skills honed in 13 years of marriage.

"Pillow talk is important," Jay says. So is sending each other e-mails at times when they can't chat in person.

"He'll bring lunch and have lunch with me at school," Hadassa says of Jay's creativity at making time together.

Ken and Yun Shey work opposite shifts, too. The family equation is simplified because they don't have children.

Ken, 48, is a wine sommelier at Paris Las Vegas, primarily at Le Provenãal. Yun, 37, is in sales at the St. John Knits boutique in the Forum Shops.

For the indefinite future he will be working nights, as his professional strength is working on the restaurant floor with actual diners. Yun has worked nights as a server in high-end restaurants, but finds the Las Vegas gourmet market less receptive to female servers.

Their present lifestyle has one principal benefit for the two, who view dining out as one of their favorite pastimes. Their days off are always weekdays, so whenever their days off intersect, they can visit restaurants minus the weekend crush of other patrons.

"Saturday night is amateur night," Yun jokes.

Dining out aside, working opposite shifts is a challenge, the couple contends.

"You could dwell on all the negatives, if you want to," Ken warns. "But I think it's more a matter of how much do people really love each other. You work around it."

Las Vegan Evonne Martinez, 37, considers the opposite-shift lifestyle to be the culprit in the recent breakup of her nine-year marriage. The final year and a half of her marriage, she and her husband worked different schedules but had only one car to share.

"I think it was the final factor. It put such a stress level on us," Martinez says, noting the couple had two kids to juggle, too.