Brazil finds a defense: Blame Mick

You can’t always get what you want, as Mick Jagger is discovering after having been blamed by some Brazilians for that country’s epic meltdown Tuesday.

They are calling the famed Rolling Stones frontman a jinx for supporting Brazil, which lost 7-1 on its soil to Germany in the World Cup semifinals.

Jagger attended the loss with his 15-year-old son, Lucas, whose mother is Brazilian model/celebrity Luciana Gimenez.

The singer also backed other teams throughout the tournament, and those clubs lost as well. Plus, Jagger wore an England cap during Brazil’s game, a country that has made losing Cup games an art form.

So Jagger clearly can’t get no satisfaction, but he received support from his ex-girlfriend, who told her fellow countrymen to get off his cloud.

“He is suffering cyber bullying .... and I would like to ask you guys who do this kind of bullying to think before you do it,” Gimenez posted on Instagram, according to London’s Daily Mail.

“Even though it only seems like a small thing, Mick is a person like us all, and he does not deserve to be treated this way by Brazilians.”

No doubt many of the Brazilians blaming Jagger aren’t serious, finding some levity to comfort them in their time of national grief.

But even those who are serious aren’t the crazy ones. Those would be the ones rioting and setting fire to at least a dozen buses in Sao Paulo.

At least that was after a loss. Some American cities — we’re looking at you, Detroit — have rioted after winning.

Now that really is crazy.

■ TIME TO SLEEP ON IT — Anyone over the age of 5 who goes to a New York Yankees-Boston Red Sox game and falls asleep by the fourth inning deserves at least some ribbing.

And ribbing is what ESPN announcers Dan Shulman and John Kruk gave Yankees fan Andrew Rector during the April 13 broadcast.

Shulman also playfully asked Kruk, not a svelte man, whether the apparently overweight fan was a relative.

“No, I don’t think so, but you never know,” Kruk said. “I didn’t get a good look at him because of the head tilt. But, I mean, physically he could be, yeah.”

Rector didn’t see the humor in the comments and decided to sue ESPN, both announcers, the Yankees and Major League Baseball for $10 million. Even more ridiculous was Rector attributing the announcers with comments they didn’t make.

To call this a frivolous lawsuit is an insult to frivolous lawsuits.

■ STRIP TO PITCH — We as Americans have a lot in which to be proud, but we apparently have grown lazy when it comes to one of our prized institutions, the ceremonial first pitch.

The most memorable first pitches in recent memory have involved 50 Cent, Carl Lewis and the former Cincinnati mayor because they were all so off the mark.

Taiwan has shown us how to do it the right way. A yoga instructor named Yan, who wore a piece of clothing that makes a miniskirt look like a tent, did a two-minute yoga routine before taking off her top to reveal a leopard-print bra.

She then tossed the first pitch, one that was more on target than what 50 Cent, Lewis and the former Cincinnati mayor tossed.

Not that anyone will remember her actual pitch.

Google the video, and you’ll understand why.

COMPILED BY MARK ANDERSON LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL