Tearjerker ‘Me Before You’ doesn’t jerk many tears

If Richard Curtis (“Love Actually,” “Notting Hill”) lost a bit of his mojo and, in order to keep food on the table, ghostwrote a Nicholas Sparks melodrama, the result would be something a lot like “Me Before You,” the feel-good-then-feel-bad-but-not-quite-as-bad-as-you-might-expect movie of the summer.

Based on the best-selling novel by Jojo Moyes, who adapts it for first-time feature director Thea Sharrock, “Me Before You” is the stuff of pure fantasy — assuming you spent your formative years dreaming of falling in love with a suicidal quadriplegic.

Will Traynor (Sam Claflin, “The Hunger Games” franchise) is a wealthy banker who, as his friends say, “out Bond-ed James Bond.” He loves life, some reasonably extreme sports and his girlfriend, Alicia (Vanessa Kirby). One morning as he goes to grab his motorcycle helmet for his daily commute, she warns him the weather’s too nasty for his bike. He demurs and, walking across the street, is run over by another motorcyclist and paralyzed.

Irony? Eye roll? You decide.

Cut to two years later when Louisa “Lou” Clark (Emilia Clarke, “Game of Thrones”) is fired from her job at a cafe and, after failed stints at a chicken processing plant and beauty shop, is inexplicably hired by Will’s mother (Janet McTeer) to look after him. After being given a rundown of Will’s daily needs by his nurse, Nathan (Stephen Peacocke), and informed she won’t have to do any of the heavy lifting, Lou asks Nathan why she’s there. “To cheer him up, I guess.”

Good luck with that. Will’s become aggressively anti-social since the accident, and he greets Lou with his best “My Left Foot” wail. His hair’s gone shaggy, his beard scraggly and he hasn’t left his parents’ estate — which the locals in the small, unnamed British town refer to as “the castle” — since his life changed forever.

But Lou, who’s the type of young woman you’d politely refer to as a “free spirit” and often dresses as though she killed a Muppet and is wearing its skin, is determined to bring Will out of his shell. Before long, he’s transformed with a proper shave, haircut and tuxedo, she’s in a pretty red dress, and they’re off for an elegant evening of classical music.

It’s basically “Beauty and the Beast” without the singing crockery.

Lou’s even saddled with a cartoonishly self-absorbed boyfriend, a fitness trainer and life coach named Gaston — err, Patrick (Matthew Lewis). During an evening at the movies after Will has opened Lou’s mind to the wonders of foreign, subtitled cinema, she wants to see the new Pedro Almodovar. Patrick just laughs and tells the box office attendant, “Two for the Will Ferrell, please.”

Subtle it ain’t.

Lou and Will are young, beautiful and madly in love. They’re a super couple. Nothing can stop them — except Will’s all-consuming desire to travel to Switzerland, where he can die with dignity. He loved his old life and simply can’t bear being in a wheelchair. So when Lou learns of his plans, she books them, and Nathan, a dream vacation to the island paradise of Mauritius. Because, as everyone knows, sunshine and fruity drinks are how you cure clinical depression.

Still, “Me Before You” is so much more enjoyable than it could have — and probably should have — been. Amid the patronizing writing and perfectly timed Ed Sheeran songs are some truly entertaining moments between the leads.

As Lou, Clarke showcases a quirkiness untapped by either “Game of Thrones” or the woeful “Terminator Genisys.” Similarly Claflin, who wasn’t asked to do much at all as “The Hunger Games’ ” cocky Finnick Odair, displays a playful, roguish charm similar to a young, pre-Divine Brown Hugh Grant.

Suicidal thoughts as a plot device are fraught with peril, but they’re handled better here than in 2014’s stupefying “If I Stay.” More worrisome is the fact that Will, the only lead character you’ll see at the multiplexes all summer who’s in a wheelchair but can’t control people’s minds, is convinced a paralyzed life isn’t a life worth living.

“Me Before You” softens some of that irresponsibility by making its characters feel like something out of a fairy tale. But by doing so, and by being so likable for most of its 110-minute runtime, the movie sort of defeats its purpose.

The result is a tearjerker that doesn’t jerk many tears.

Contact Christopher Lawrence at clawrence@reviewjournal.com. On Twitter: @life_onthecouch